Swing into open space...
Life is like Trapeze Bars (By Danaan Perry), when you move forward you have to swing into open air between bars, not always knowing whether you will make a graceful landing or miss the bar completely. Removing myself from my old blueprint has been scary and harder than anticipated. It's like my body is ready for change, but my subby is still holding on for dear life. I can see where I need to go and what I need to do to get there. I know that when I finally land there I will have grown as a person and I will be more equipped to jump to the next one. But my mind is calculating that distance as 3x more than what it really is.
In week 5 I said Yes, and I committed 100%, I swung toward the next bar, and man was it hard! My subby had so many tantrums, it did not
like doing the things I was making it do, but as week 6 starts I can feel myself moving toward the next part of my new blueprint, subby is starting to see that what I am telling it is actually really fun and good for it! Reading Scroll II is amazing, it's just what I needed in life right now.
Funny that, Synchronicity at work!
I underlined the part where it says "I will welcome obstacles for they are my challenge." I have always struggled with getting overly frustrated when I face a challenge, and I have been working on seeing them as learning curves and when I make it past them I like to look back at the lessons I learned. One of the challenges I am having, and I like to laugh about this one, the "I will," the first page that I read I realized I completely skipped the words will when they showed up. I can't wait till we can finally scratch them out, it feels weird to read it all in future tense.
Lately I have been struggling with the night time reads because I work till 9:30 at night and I have to wait till everyone to leave so I can lock up, so I don't leave till 10:00-10:15, meaning I don't get home till about 11 and it just slips my mind that I have things to read. but I have finally solved my problem! After each read I set up all my books and papers and pens on my bed in a way that I'd have to consciously move them out of the way in order to fall asleep, if I have the energy to move them, I have the energy to read them.